Lee Geiger

I’m on a tequila diet…so far I’ve lost two days.

A sign outside a bar in San Francisco

Raise your hand if you’re a fan of “Bar Rescue,” a Spike TV reality show featuring bar and nightclub transformations. Good. Now raise your hand if you’re not. Nice. Now go get a life. But before you do, be sure to watch this Sunday’s season finale.

Why? Because the star of Sunday’s show is none other than Carin Hawkins, a too-sexy-to-be-a-grandmother hair stylist who has been trimming my salt and pepper locks for almost twenty years. I’ve written previously about Carin and her journey from single mom to forty and fabulous fitness model. I’ve always said her inspirational life story should be made into a movie, and all this petite tornado of energy needed to get Hollywood’s attention was to give them a snippet of her super-sized persona.

Truth be told, the real star of Sunday’s episode is Greg Hawkins, Carin’s too-hunky-to-be-a-grandfather husband. But from the very first moment she told me that her husband’s San Mateo, CA nightspot would be dissected by Jon Tafer, the “Bar Rescue’s” mercurial restaurant consultant whose on-camera mission is to belittle the people in charge, I knew the show’s producers would leave plenty of room in the script to feature the vivacious brunette known as Mrs. Hawkins. Turns out I was right.

Sunday’s finale is billed as “Mandala Down: A self-proclaimed ‘nightlife expert’ afflicted by mounting debt and a ballooning ego butts heads with Jon as he battles to show him the error of his ways.” That’s the official version.

The unofficial version goes something like this: “Mandala Makeover: Jon yells at Greg. Greg yells back, then decides it’s in his best interest to shut up and listen. Carin walks into the bar to offer her support. Greg comes to realize that while owning a bar is cool, being married to Carin in cooler.”

For those of you living in the San Francisco Bay Area, check out Greg’s remodeled nightspot, the swanky 38th Floor Bar. It was an incredible transformation. And if you can, make time to attend the club’s Episode Premier Party on Sunday, April 12 at 38 East 25th Ave., San Mateo.